late night questions

how do people exist? 

I wonder at what goes on in their minds....

what lives in their thought life? 

what do they fear? 

what do they love? 

what do they think of humanity? 

of God's love?

do they love someone? 

does that person love them back?  

do they get lonely late at night? 

what happens when they have dark thoughts? 

do they cry? 

do they scream? 

do they talk to someone about it or bottle it all up inside?

it's these questions that I find intriguing. 

it's people that I find intriguing. 

but sometimes I feel like a bother. 

like talking to me means taking time out of the real conversations... 

one's the other person would rather be having. 

I talk a lot, I have a lot of opinions. 

I sometimes don't know what to say...

do they go away happy? 

are they glad they talked with me? 

do they feel like they've had a worthwhile conversation?

or is it just small talk until they can escape my eager conversation?

words

piled 

on 

words.

fears behind the mouth,

questions behind the eyes,

hungry for friendships,

for love,

in the simplest, 

most honest and innocent way possible.

vulnerability is a frightening thing, 

but when people ask you to open up 

it's freeing.

yet I tear myself down with these fears and doubts,

convincing myself that no one,

really

wants to talk with me.

how do I do that?

how do WE do that?

I know I'm not alone, 

I know that with a new year comes new fears,

but I also know that God is faithful to 

still those fears.

time and time again

He calms my mind and reassures 

me of the great love I've been blessed with.

both from Him

and from others.

if you're having doubts and fears,

promise me you won't forget that either.

<3 Eva

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look for Christ and you will find Him.
and with Him, everything else
c.s lewis | via